I am giving up FEAR for Lent
I am giving up FEAR for Lent this year. Will you join me on this journey?
I had been contemplating a Lenten fast for a few days leading up to Ash Wednesday. It is common for me, and many people, to say, “I will give up chocolate for Lent”. That works for the route of subtracting unnecessary things from life. Another option is often to commit to going to weekly prayer services or Eucharistic Adoration, if one wants to go the route of adding something positive to their spiritual life for Lent. The typical focus of Lent that most Pastors speak about on Ash Wednesday is: Fasting, Prayer, and Alms giving. It is all important for this season, and each of these disciplines can help grow the spiritual life.
However, since the start of the New Year, I have been working on my goals and “vision statement” for my career, and I have been stuck. I have yet to be able to create a clear plan for 2023 to guide my work life, and I realized it is due to an underlying problem that I have been carrying my whole life. I have deep fears around the issue of money.
“There is no fear in love, but perfect love drives out fear because fear has to do with punishment, and so one who fears is not yet perfect in love.” (1 John 4:18)
This verse hit me decades ago
when I was a very young mommy-to-be, doing a daily bible-reading practice.
Since then, these words have floated to the surface of my mind time and again, as if to remind me of something bigger that I need to address. These words have spoken to me in different ways, depending on the season of my life, as is typical with a lectio divina scripture reading practice. This year, I believe this bible verse is calling me out of a “littleness” in my faith and into a mountain moving faith.
“One who fears is not yet perfect in love.” Wow! That feels like a powerfully convicting statement. I can finally admit that I have major money hang-ups. For example, I look at the cost of every little thing I do or buy, rather than the ultimate benefit it may bring to me or my family. I typically worry about how much the bill will cost the whole time I am out to dinner at a restaurant. This worry almost makes the recreational event of dining out a problem rather than something fun and enjoyable. Even more troubling, I realize that I have been limiting my own goals and dreams by going after “easy targets” that I know will result in secure and adequate financial income. I have been shying away from dreams to which I feel my heart is calling me, that may not have the secure income I have come to depend on. Fear is keeping me safe– and preventing my growth. Maybe you have been struggling with a limiting fear too? I think many of us allow our fears to keep us small, but safe, in one way or another.
“Perfect love drives out fear.” This Lent, I am going to dig into the Bible and the wisdom of the Saints to try to know that “perfect love” more deeply. I pray that by knowing love, my fears around money will be driven out of my life. If you have a limiting fear that you believe is holding you back, I invite you to join me on this journey of discovering “perfect love.”
I am giving up Fear for Lent. How about you?